Blake, my heart goes out to you! I know the feeling you describe too well. And yet, as a fellow wanderer, I offer this suggestion - The settling doesn't come from changing locations. It doesn't come from being with the right people at the right time. The settling has to occur in your heart, independent of place or circumstance. The feeling of peace we seek is entirely internal; our task is to quiet the heart and the ego long enough to let the peace free. IMHO Anne
Ahhh I hear this so much. Really there aren't many (any?) trailblazers ahead of you who have lived this way and can model where it leads or what comes of it in the end. I remember that made me feel lonely and a bit unmoored when I was living similarly. Where does this lead? Most of the rest of us seem to have stepped off that path at some point. Why? Were we afraid? Exhausted? Found someone or something that made "rooted-ness" worth trying? Healed parts of our selves we were running from? I can't answer for everyone, likely the answer is different for all. I don't know if you'll be ever content on this path or musing stepping off it at some point. However, the previous commenter below reminded me of something. I read a quote once that shook me, and in the end resulted in my feeling freedom from the constant need to be on the move. "What one does not trouble to find within will not be discovered by transporting the body hither and yon." (Advice given to Paramahansa Yogananda in 'Autobiography of a Yogi', chapter 13). That one hit me like a ton of bricks. The feeling of freedom and belonging gained by moving around between different countries, different friends, was always short-lived (it was for me, anyway), necessitating the need to move on before long, to get that dopamine hit elsewhere. The chase was real. Yet the true freedom to choose whether to go or to stay truly lies within? That hit me hard. Needless to say, lots of self-work and therapy followed this quote, and do I feel free now, rooted? As much as one can be when raising two young kids. I'm never sorry to have traveled so much, and also now I'm not sorry to be rooted for this phase of life. There is joy in having done it. So few have, it is a gift. Will I travel again when they're grown? DEFINITELY. Settling down is not an end-game. Merely a long stop on the path.
Blake, my heart goes out to you! I know the feeling you describe too well. And yet, as a fellow wanderer, I offer this suggestion - The settling doesn't come from changing locations. It doesn't come from being with the right people at the right time. The settling has to occur in your heart, independent of place or circumstance. The feeling of peace we seek is entirely internal; our task is to quiet the heart and the ego long enough to let the peace free. IMHO Anne
Settle down, settle down. It's easy when you know its time to build and give back.
Ahhh I hear this so much. Really there aren't many (any?) trailblazers ahead of you who have lived this way and can model where it leads or what comes of it in the end. I remember that made me feel lonely and a bit unmoored when I was living similarly. Where does this lead? Most of the rest of us seem to have stepped off that path at some point. Why? Were we afraid? Exhausted? Found someone or something that made "rooted-ness" worth trying? Healed parts of our selves we were running from? I can't answer for everyone, likely the answer is different for all. I don't know if you'll be ever content on this path or musing stepping off it at some point. However, the previous commenter below reminded me of something. I read a quote once that shook me, and in the end resulted in my feeling freedom from the constant need to be on the move. "What one does not trouble to find within will not be discovered by transporting the body hither and yon." (Advice given to Paramahansa Yogananda in 'Autobiography of a Yogi', chapter 13). That one hit me like a ton of bricks. The feeling of freedom and belonging gained by moving around between different countries, different friends, was always short-lived (it was for me, anyway), necessitating the need to move on before long, to get that dopamine hit elsewhere. The chase was real. Yet the true freedom to choose whether to go or to stay truly lies within? That hit me hard. Needless to say, lots of self-work and therapy followed this quote, and do I feel free now, rooted? As much as one can be when raising two young kids. I'm never sorry to have traveled so much, and also now I'm not sorry to be rooted for this phase of life. There is joy in having done it. So few have, it is a gift. Will I travel again when they're grown? DEFINITELY. Settling down is not an end-game. Merely a long stop on the path.
do you B